Lately I have been thinking about San Francisco a lot. I miss it but I miss the San Francisco I remember.
San Francisco has become an absolute shit show. I mean it has been decades in the making but it is now the most expensive places to live for no damn reason other than Silicon Valley that has destroyed the city and its culture.
Anyway I just miss that period in my life. I was a fucking mess, messier than I am now but the experience in San Francisco, the people I have met in San Francisco have truly shaped me.
I just miss being able to go out my door and seeing Ocean beach. I miss my apartment shaking because of the incoming L train that comes every twenty minutes. I miss taking walks from Fisherman’s wharf to North beach to eat Italian deserts with my friend Aaron. I miss making random friends at a fancy hat shop. I miss getting invited to bougie events. I miss the Applebee’s bartender that would take me to speakeasies and give me all the free cocaine I wanted.
I miss the messiness. I miss the excitement. I miss meeting eccentric new people.
The last time I went it was weird. The gentrification that is happening in the Sunset is fucking bizarre. Out of all my friends only one, yes one can afford to live in the city still.
They say home is a feeling. I can confirm that. It’s just hurts to know I can never go home again.