Yesterday was really nice. After writing my post yesterday I felt very anxious. Honestly I really feel like a fucking loser back at square one. It’s not a good feeling. I know it takes time but fuck can I have my shit together already? I started to paint my house but it didn’t make me feel any better. I claim to be a home body but I hate being in the house all day. I feel like I’m losing my fucking mind. My mom invited me to go to Chino Hills for some shopping.
Everything was nice for the most part except for a small mishap at Marshall’s.
I don’t know how to say this but I pretty much experience racial aggressions everyday of my life. I usually ignore them because it’s not worth my time and honestly you just get use to it but yesterday I wasn’t in the mood.
I went into the dressing room to try on one item. The first odd thing is the dressing room attendant took the dress out of my hand examined the dress and told me it was cute and handed me a number. I didn’t see that as necessary but okay. I try it on and take some photos for the blog and get out of the dressing room. The lady was helping another person when I got out and told me I had to wait because she had to check me out. I didn’t understand I had one item that I clearly still had in my hand. I told her she was tripping and then I left. She followed me for a little bit too but I guess gave up. There was no need to check me out especially since you already scoped what I had and I had one item.
I’m always for the worker. I know how shitty these jobs can be but if you take the time out of your day to be disrespectful best believe it’s not going to be pretty.
It got worse when I told my mom about it and my mom don’t play. I bet the whole store heard her yell at this lady for racial profiling me.
Anyway I got a lot of cute things yesterday and for the most part the day was great. I’m glad as the days go on I’m getting closer and closer to my mom. I hate that it took losing a pregnancy to realize how much my mom truly is a ride or die. I hate that I didn’t appreciate my mom as much as before but I’m trying to make up for lost time. Until next time my friends but here are some photos of the things I got yesterday.